The Pain Causer

The tears in my eyes,

Will not fall.

As bad as I want to cry...

I can't.

My emotions won't let me

Express the way I feel.

I won't listen to my heart,

Because I hate the fact of...

Being hurt,

Over and over again.

I can't listen to my mind,

Because I don't know

What to do anymore.

....I'm confused....
....And Lost....
I'm.....hurt and....angry
At myself.
For always setting myself up,
For a disappointment.
Always getting my hopes up,
For what reason?
I go through Hell
Each and Everyday.
Why?
Because I want more
Pain and Suffering in my life?
No!
I hate myself for doing this.
If I could do myself a favor,
It would be death.
So I can stop
Giving myself pain.
But not just myself, but
Everyone else I've
Given Hell to.
The way I've caused hurt to people...
I should have no reason...
To live.
I'm done with living my life.
What's the point anymore?
Why keep living,
When I know the end of the story?
I won't live
Happily ever after.
I'll live
Being nothing more
But
A Pain Causer